Yes, I see this now in my mid fifties. How more manageable Xmas would have been if I’d had this awareness when my children were little. As a single parent I felt so much pressure over Xmas to have everything as it ‘should’ be. When the children went to their dad’s the day after Boxing Day I always felt bereft, tearful, exhausted and lost. One year we were given two months notice to leave our rented house at the end of November. I worked, had to find a new place to live, had to pack up our house and move by the end of January and still did all those things that I thought had to be done to make a ‘magical’ Xmas for the children. Which was in my mind the priority. But. It took its toll I realise now. I was desperate, tearful, scared, exhausted but had no regard for how I was feeling because you just get on with it. What do the children remember about Xmas ? Rudolph leaving half eaten carrots next to their stockings. What was I do at midnight on Xmas eve? Half eating carrots. Yes that bit was worth it. Thank you Karen xxx
Oh goodness! I didn't even do that with the carrots and neither did Father Christmas get a drink or mince pies! I remember feeling pressure to make it better for them when I was a single parent because I felt guilty that their dad and I weren't together. Then into my second marriage and 6 children between us I was too exhausted. After a while it occurred to me that they were getting more anyway! Two Christmas's. Two lots of presents. Two Christmas dinners and puddings.
And this: "I was desperate, tearful, scared, exhausted but had no regard for how I was feeling because you just get on with it." Makes me so sad to think of you feeling like this. It sounds like you didn't feel you had a choice. It's all sold to us like we don't have a choice when we DO!
You had no regard for how you were feeling. You were feelling. You were feeling..... And how often are we taught from a very young age to ignore our own feelings to satisfy the needs of others or society?
I am wishing you a more peaceful Christmas this year Carmen and hope you are listening to the whispers (or shouts) from your body to give it what it needs and sending lots of love. XXX
So, almost finished my christmas shopping which has been minimal and it's only 2nd December. The one problem I have with doing it this early is resisting the temptation to buy more things when I see stuff I think people will like.
More stuff means more to wrap. Means more time. And more energy. 🤪 STOP!
Yes, I see this now in my mid fifties. How more manageable Xmas would have been if I’d had this awareness when my children were little. As a single parent I felt so much pressure over Xmas to have everything as it ‘should’ be. When the children went to their dad’s the day after Boxing Day I always felt bereft, tearful, exhausted and lost. One year we were given two months notice to leave our rented house at the end of November. I worked, had to find a new place to live, had to pack up our house and move by the end of January and still did all those things that I thought had to be done to make a ‘magical’ Xmas for the children. Which was in my mind the priority. But. It took its toll I realise now. I was desperate, tearful, scared, exhausted but had no regard for how I was feeling because you just get on with it. What do the children remember about Xmas ? Rudolph leaving half eaten carrots next to their stockings. What was I do at midnight on Xmas eve? Half eating carrots. Yes that bit was worth it. Thank you Karen xxx
Oh goodness! I didn't even do that with the carrots and neither did Father Christmas get a drink or mince pies! I remember feeling pressure to make it better for them when I was a single parent because I felt guilty that their dad and I weren't together. Then into my second marriage and 6 children between us I was too exhausted. After a while it occurred to me that they were getting more anyway! Two Christmas's. Two lots of presents. Two Christmas dinners and puddings.
And this: "I was desperate, tearful, scared, exhausted but had no regard for how I was feeling because you just get on with it." Makes me so sad to think of you feeling like this. It sounds like you didn't feel you had a choice. It's all sold to us like we don't have a choice when we DO!
You had no regard for how you were feeling. You were feelling. You were feeling..... And how often are we taught from a very young age to ignore our own feelings to satisfy the needs of others or society?
I am wishing you a more peaceful Christmas this year Carmen and hope you are listening to the whispers (or shouts) from your body to give it what it needs and sending lots of love. XXX
So, almost finished my christmas shopping which has been minimal and it's only 2nd December. The one problem I have with doing it this early is resisting the temptation to buy more things when I see stuff I think people will like.
More stuff means more to wrap. Means more time. And more energy. 🤪 STOP!
Well said! 👏
I've done Christmas in all kinds of ways over the years, but each time I do feel overspent, in every sense, even the year when we didn't do presents!
Here's a way of transforming an unwanted gift into the best night with friends in January, please meet Secret Satan, Secret Santa's evil twin! 😂
https://katedarracott.substack.com/p/life-hack-part-2-secret-satan
Thank you so much for sharing Secret Satan game. You made my day! 🤣🤣😍